Earlier today I tweeted this out after hearing the devastating news of a good friend’s marriage hitting its end, with three young children involved.
A close friend is getting divorced because he was caught cheating multiple times. He had a good wife but could never be content. Sad.
— Mark Baxter (@realmarkbaxter) October 30, 2016
As is often the case, my initial reaction to it was still a bit tainted by 33 years of blue pill conditioning.
As I had a quiet moment this afternoon to reflect upon this I began see the red pill truth in what was happening.
First of all, I think it is true that my friend isn’t content, and that many of us face this same feeling nearly every single day. We long for something more, we just aren’t quite sure what it is. His lack of contentment, combined with his genetic desire for new poon, led him to cheat.
Secondly, I think the culture surrounding men like my friend lets them down. Had he been surrounded by other men that espoused the virtues of faithfulness and loyalty perhaps he would have been less likely to stray. Peer group pressure is incredibly powerful, unfortunately, I think his (work) peer group was pressuring him to mess up his life.
But that’s not what made me uneasy this afternoon. What had me thinking is, why did his wife choose right now to leave him? He’s been a cheater since before they got married (she knew and chose to marry him anyway).
Nothing’s changed. They’ve got more invested than ever. Three young children, a home, a strong community life.
Now, suddenly, she’s ready to leave him because she “can’t trust him anymore?”
My red pill intuition tells me something more is going on, and it has little to do with his cheating, that’s just a convenient excuse to blow it all up.
She’s an attractive woman in her early 30’s that works in the medical field. She’s around doctors all day. She’s a woman with opportunities.
Now, with the drudgery and grind of raising three children looming on a daily basis, the call of something new is intense.
My instinct tells me she’s either branch swinging to something new or she’s making up for missing out.
Nothing else has changed but her own mind. A woman doesn’t leave a marriage with a high value man unless she thinks she can do better, whether he’s cheating or not.
I’m not excusing his side of things, but he’s a high value man and well respected in the community. His wife doesn’t just decide to leave for “trust” issues.
She’s played it perfectly, everyone assumes she’s the victim and she’s gone out of her way to tell everyone her side of the story first, before he’s had the chance.
But something isn’t quite right about that story. She sees the prize. 50% of her time free of kids plus her living situation stays the same, and now she can “be free” and experience other men.
It’s right out of the red pill playbook, I should have seen it immediately, but I’m glad my catch up time is down to just a few hours.